Wednesday, 26 February 2014

PRINT THE LEGEND - Jeanne de Clisson "The Lioness of Brittany"

Jeanne-Louis de Belleville
1300 - 1359

The Legend.

When her second husband Oliver III de Clisson failed to defend Vannes [1] against British forces, he fell under suspicion by the French, especially Charles of Blois and so fled to Britain.  He was later captured by the French while on vacation in France [2] or attending a Tourney in French territory [1] and was hanged [4] or beheaded [2][3][4] in 1326 [2] or 1343 [1] and his head displayed on the wall of the castle of Boufay [2][1].

Jeanne sought revenge.  She "sold off every inch of her family's land" [1][2][3][5] and possibly sold her body to nobels [3][4] and lead massacres, including an attack on the Chateau Thébaut [3].  When the land war got too dangerous [3] she bought the three biggest warships she could find" [5] and painted them jet black and gave them red sails [1][2][3][4]. From 1337 [1] or 1346 [2] until 1356 she "ruled the waves" with her "the Black Fleet" [2] a fleet of "the most fabulous ships the world will likely ever know." [5]  She was "known for" killing everyone aboard French ships belonging to King Philip VI she seized (including beheading French aristocrats with an axe), apart from one [2] or two [2][3][5] or three [3] (a few [4]) sailors who were ordered to inform the French king of what she had done.  She kept the channel free of French warships and kept the British army supplied until well after Philip's death in 1350. [2]

In 1356 she married English nobleman Sir Walter Bentley,[3] but later returned to France and died in 1359. [2]

The Truth.
John III, Duke of Brittany died with no male heirs in 1341, his half brother John IV contested the rights of his niece Joanna of Penthièvre, and her husband, Charles of Blois, to the Duchy of Brittany leading to the Breton War of Succession.  Oliver, a supporter of John IV's was captured at a tournament and executed.

French legal records from 1343 do condemn Jeanne as a traitor in her own right and order the confiscation of her lands.  There is a record 1345 order by the English court that Jeanne be granted an income from lands King Edward III of England (who had supported the by this time late John III, and his successor John IV) now controlled in Brittany.  She is later mentioned in a 1349 truce agreement as a valuable English ally.  These sources suggested she may have been involved in martial activities for a period of five months, between Oliver's death and her fleeing to England.  In 1349 she married English nobleman Sir Walter Bentley, Edwards' commander and they returned to England where Bentley became responsible for all of Edward's interests in Brittany.

It is not known when she died, but her son Oliver claimed her lands and incomesin 1359 and received them.  Oliver later allied himself with the French, gaining back his father's title and lands and becoming Constable of France under Charles VI.

In 1868, French writer Émile Pehant's novel Jean de Belleville was published in France.  Writing at the height of the French Romantic Movement, Pehant's novel shares many details with the legend attached to Jeanne.

~ DUG.

Tuesday, 25 February 2014

PRINT THE LEGEND - Introduction

The internet.  Repository of all human knowledge.  Full of lies and myths made true.  Sometimes the "truth" is too good to be true.

  • Jeanne de Clisson (The Lioness of Brittany).
  • Wednesday, 19 February 2014

    SIMPSONS DID IT - All You Can Eat Seafood (part 1)

    Martin v. A Ca-Shi Sushi

    12th November 1992.

    The first broadcast of "New Kid on the Block" (The Simpsons Season 4 Episode 8) in which Homer Simpson sues an All You Can Eat Seafood restaurant because he hadn't had all he could eat.

    Early May 2010.

    David Martin entered A Ca-Shi to take advantage of their $28 All You Can Eat Sushi deal.  Martin then began to eat just the sashimi (the fish) and left the rice.  A Ca-Shi owner Jay Oh said he'd have to eat the rice to get more sushi.  Martin said that he is a type-2 diabetic he can't eat rice.  Oh offered two plates of sashimi for a total cost of $25.  Martin left the restaurant having paid the al a carte price for the sushi.

    20th May 2010

    Martin filed suit in the Los Angeles County Superior Court against A Ca-Shi for $4,000 for discriminating against his disability and "humiliation, embarrassment and mental anguish".  The case was scheduled appear in court 25 February 2011, however ever since the LA Times broke the story a week before the case there has been no real follow up by the many media outlets who picked up the story.

    [UPDATE:  See part 2]

    SIMPSONS DID IT - Introduction

    As the season 6 episode of South Park "Simpsons Already Did It" points out, there have been so many episodes of The Simpson (13 seasons at that stage) that it was difficult for shows to come up with new ideas that The Simpsons hadn't already done.  That happens with fiction.  But what about reality?  Can it come up with original ideas, or is it stuck copying The Simpsons.

    ~ DUG.

    Wednesday, 12 February 2014

    WHY ISN'T THIS A FILM - Introduction

    There are true stories out there and some of those are better than the films we see.  These posts are some of the real stories that I think would make great films but have never appeared properly on the big screen.

    Some of these stories have been low budget films. telemovies or straight to video.  Some have been in-name-only versions or reproductions of "the legend" but not the facts.

    ~ DUG.

    WHY ISN'T THIS A FILM - Alexander & Draga.

    The Life and Romance of King Alexander I of Sebia and Queen Draga:

    A Love Story.

    Royal Pageantry - Politics - Forbidden Love - Love over country - Betrayal - Conspiracy - Murder

    Why isn't this a film?

    In 1889, when Aleksandar Obrenović was 13 his father King Milan I of Serbia unexpectedly abdicated the throne and retired to Paris.  Milan left his ex-wife, Natalija as regent until Aleksandar at 18.

    At the age of 16, Aleksandar declared him an adult and took control of the country a move that had popular support.  He brought his father back to lead the army.

    Despite his father trying to arrange a marriage for Aleksandar with a German princess, in the summer of 1900 Aleksandar announced his engagement Draga Mašin, a former lady-in-waiting to his mother and a widow 12 years his senior.  Public opinion was against it. His father and the Prime Minister immediately resigned.  His mother objected to the union and was banished from the country.  Tsar Nicholas II of Russia sent his congratulations and accepted a request to act as principal witness, which lead to more acceptance of the marriage, but Aleksandar's Kingship was weakened in the eyes of the republic and the army.  Rumours abound that Draga was manipulating the young king and one of her two unpopular brothers would be named his successor.

    This eventually led (at the age 26) to his and his Queen's murder at the hands of a military conspiracy (which later became The Black Hand organisation that caused WWI).

    Previous Films of this story:
    • Maria Draga (1932) aka A Woman Commands [US]
    • Königin Draga (1920) [Germany]

    Should be in the style of:

    • Queen Elisabeth (1998)
    • Marie Annoinette (2006)

    ~ DUG.

    Wednesday, 5 February 2014

    CUE THE HORROR THEME MUSIC - Miami Zombie Attack

    26th May 2012.

    Rudy Eugene's car broke down.  He walked away from his car, leaving 5 recently consumed water bottles and his bible.  As he walked he removed and discarded his clothes.  He soon came across homeless man Ronald Poppo, Eugene, by this time completely naked, began to strip Poppo and eat his face.  After an 18 minute attack Eugene was shot ded by a police officer and Poppo was left with most of his face missing and his left eye gouged out...